11 Co-Workers Everyone Has

11 Co-Workers Everyone Has



1. The Clinger

What are you laughing at? SHOW ME.
Oh, can I join you for lunch? BFFs!
You’re getting coffee? NOW ME TOO.
Is this your stop? SAMESIES.
What are you working on? I HAVE 300 QUESTIONS ABOUT IT.

2. The One-Upper

Oh, were YOU working on that brief? I might have already sent a draft to my boss and cc’d your boss and also highlighted errors from your last three emails also I made banana bread for the office, gluten-free because the CEO has an allergy to wheat.

3. The Klutz

No matter what he’s doing, The Klutz always manages to have something wrong with him – whether it’s a self-inflicted injury or just the world conspiring against him, it’s no fun being The Klutz.

4. The Downer

APPARENTLY the world just RAINS PROBLEMS onto this person’s head. A great person to turn to if you’re having a good day and need to be grounded.

6. The Cheerleader

8 a.m. meetings? They’re the greatest.
Office retreats? The greatest.
Six-hour all-staff meetings? Super the greatest.
Lukewarm leftovers for lunch? COULD NOT BE GREATER.

7. The Office Crush

Not very productive, but who really cares when they’re so nice to look at?

8. The Image-Obsessed

The Image-Obsessed is very focused on looking like they’re doing a great job. Whether or not they’re actually doing a great job is less important.

9. The Health Nut


The Health Nut enjoys the finer things in life: going to the gym, drinking green juice, talking about how much they go to the gym, judging everyone who doesn’t drink green juice…

10. The One Who’s Always “Sick”

But really, when is the last time they were in the office? Do they still work here?

11. The Creative One

“Oh, this is just my day job,” they repeat again and again, handing you seemingly endless flyers for their gallery opening/DJ night/improv show/interactive face painting exhibit lampooning the farce that is modern politics.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine has even more kooky characters – tune in Tuesdays at 9/8c on FOX to see them in action. Now it’s your turn. Tell us other office quirks that bother you.

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